


Welcome to South Park High

by CraigsGangFukz



Category: South Park
Genre: Adults, Alternate Universe - Parents, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-05-18 20:40:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19342213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CraigsGangFukz/pseuds/CraigsGangFukz
Summary: All the South Park kids are now parents and its their kids freshman year of high school





	1. First Day

Their childhoods were filled with slurs of how South Park sucked and when they made it to high school they all had big plans to finally get out of the shitty little mountain town. Token and Kyle both planned to go to New York to attend the best of law school, Wendy had posters of Harvard, Yale, and Princeton taped inside her locker, Craig swore he'd get to see space one day, Tweek vowed he'd go anywhere to get away from his parents coffee shop.

But let's be honest this is South Park were talking about, nobody leaves…  
The closest any of them got was the University of Denver and then graduation brought them all right back to their hometown.

~~~~~

“Apollo, hurry up and feed Stripe and get down here so you can eat breakfast before school, your dad went all out” Craig's voice still monotone through adulthood.

Upstairs Apollo Tucker was feeding Stripe XII sticks of celery, at the sound of his dad's voice he rolled his eyes and headed towards the stairs. When he made it halfway down he saw said dad still waiting at the bottom step looking at him with an a deadpan stare. He flipped him the Tucker signature bird.

“I don't get why were having breakfast, its freshman year not my fucking graduation day..” Apollo had definitely inherited Craig no fucks attitude.

“Ack- I thought it would be nice to make sure you had a good breakfast before y-you're first day of high school” Tweek's response came as he walked into the living room to meet his son and husband of 16 years.

“But-”

“Just get your ass in there and eat the food your fucking dad made” Craig cut him off ruffling his hand through his sons shaggy unruly raven hair.

~~~~~

“Mommm Brittney is taking forever in the bathroom and I still haven't even showered yet”

Bebe walked out her bedroom to meet her son at the bathroom door.

“If you would have woke up when your dad got up you would have got in there before her” Scolding her son and then knocking on the bathroom door “Brit Baby, Bradley also needs to get ready for school, go finish your makeup in your room please”

Brittney Donovan walked out of the bathroom tying her chocolate curls in a ponytail with her phone sandwiched between her cheek and shoulder no doubt on the phone with her best friend.

“Oh my god McCormick your boyfriend is being a baby again, whatever--” her words trailed off as she walked into her bedroom and her brother rushed into the bathroom slamming the door.

Bebe made a mental note to tell Clyde later tonight to make sure Bradley got up with him before he headed to the school for football practice.

~~~~~

“But he’s such a cutie” Melanie cooed finishing the french braid and flipping it over her shoulder and picking her phone up and pressing it to her ear; taking it off speakerphone. She walked out of the bathroom down the stairs to the dining room where her father was already sitting scrolling through his phone. Taking her seat she rambled on to her friend.

“Are we planning on going off campus for lunch today?” she squealed, she looked over and her father quickly stuck his phone in the pocket of his parka.

“Melanie I've told you how I feel about phones at the table..” Butters entered the room with a tray full of pancakes and orange juice.

“But Dad, it's Brittney!” she groaned at her dad, scrunching her blonde brows in a frown

“Kennyyy help me out” her dad whined as he set the tray on the table. Kenny looked up at his husband and then back down to her.

“Sweetheart, you’ll see Brittney in an hour, you know your dad doesn't like phones at the table”

“Okay Brit I gotta go, yeah… okay, love you too bye!” she stuffed her phone in her pocket and took the plate of pancakes offered to her and they ate their breakfast together like every morning. 

~~~~~

“Stan will you please tell your daughter to hurry up, I have a schedule to keep” Wendy asked from the kitchen as she poured a cup of coffee.

Stan slowly got up from the couch and trudged upstairs to his daughters room, he could hear the sounds of some rap artist she’s enthralled with at the moment through the closed door. He knocked twice and then peeked his head into the room.

“Sarah are you ready yet? Mrs.Mayor is taking you on her way to town hall, and shes pacing.” He jokingly mocked his wife.

“Yeah, yeah, just let me put my shoes on” she huffed slipping her feet into her dingy white vans and grabbing her phone off the charger pausing the music to slip it into her back pocket.

As soon as she hit the bottom step, Wendy stood up from her seat on the couch and turned to her husband and daughter. 

“You look so good Hun, are you ready to go?” she placed her hands on her daughter's cheeks, admiring her dark hair that was pulled back and the slight makeup framing her bright blue eyes. 

Sarah nodded and turned to hug her dad as they walked to the door, Wendy quickly turned to kiss her husband before following her daughter out the door.

~~~~~

Slipping into his shoes he walked down the stairs through the living room where his dad was sitting; on the phone, no doubt with the mayor, to the kitchen. He sat down and grabbed a piece of toast from the stack, smiling through his chew at his mom who turned from the fridge to join him. 

“Token! Are you going to join us for breakfast?” Nicole’s sweet voice rang through the kitchen.

Token walked in, in the middle of hanging up the phone, walking by Jamal and patting his shoulder before taking his seat.

“First day of Freshman year, how do you feel?” he looked over at his son before taking a sip of the coffee his wife had made him.

“Not too different than yesterday, to be honest, because I doubt I'll be doing anything today except for practice with Coach Donovan and lunch with Sarah, and that's basically been my whole week.”

“Well good luck today, and I mean with Clyde” Token laughed as his son got up from the table heading for the door.

“Will do.”

~~~~~

“Eric where are the kids!?” Kyle groaned as he entered the kitchen where he found his husband but neither his son or daughter sat with him.

“How would I know that?” Cartman retorted not even looking up from his breakfast 

“BECAUSE I TOLD YOU TO GET THEM UP AN HOUR AGO!” Kyle was now beyond pissed, they were going to be fucking late.

Eric looked up with a strip of bacon hanging from his frown, “I thought you woke them up Sweetheart” he whined

Kyle rolled his eyes at his husband and turned out of the kitchen and rushed up the stairs into Kylie’s room and woke her and as he turned to enter Aaron's room he saw him leaving the bathroom fully dressed and ready.

“Why didn't you wake your sister up?!” he scolded his son 

“She's not my responsibility, I got myself up she could have done the same” There it was, the attitude he got from his father that pissed Kyle off beyond belief.

“Get down stairs before I beat your ass.” He growled, the boy not only had Eric’s face but definitely his attitude, but thanks to Kyle he didn't share Eric’s physique.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little insight into the relationships and lives of the families of South Park

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Finally did a Chapter 2 sorry about the wait but all i have time to do is go to work and come home to sleep to do it all over again. But its up and i had a lot of fun writing this part, this chapter is kind of just so you see and understand all the relationships between the characters and what the kids are doing with their lives now that they're all parents/adults.

South Park High's courtyard was full of teenagers mingling and chatting about their summers and exchanging class schedules before the bell rang for said classes to start. On the front steps leading into the building sat the new generation also known as the freshman.

Apollo Tucker stood propped against the hand railing talking to Bradley Donovan who was leaned forward sitting on the stairs, with his arms wrapped around his girlfriend; Melanie McCormick, who was squealing on the step below him about whatever her best friend Brittney Donovan was going on about next to her. Also enthralled in Brittney's story was Kylie Cartman who sat on the other side of Brittney, with her arm interlocked with her bestie Sarah Marsh who was deep in conversation with her boyfriend Jamal Black and Aaron Cartman about some R&B album that was released over the summer.

"Okay fuckers listen-" Apollo, the self asserted leader of the gang was cut off by the bell blaring through the lawn. 

The group groaned and broke apart as they walked into the halls to find their respective homerooms.

~~~~~

"I still don't understand why you won't get your license honey." Craig looked over at his husband who sat in the passenger seat.

"Because Craig, ahh- that's way too much pressure what if I crash and die on the way to work?!" Tweek screeched and looked expectantly at his husband. Craig merely chuckled and grabbed his husbands hand and rubbed it with his thumb to show Tweek he understood.

It's not that Craig didn't enjoy driving Tweek to the Tweek Bros. everyday, its just different than when they were teenagers where it was a part time job for Tweek. Now he owns the store and it really is out of Craig's drive to the Planetarium, he also owns a business that's a full time job, and he's not gonna lie it would help if Tweek could drive himself to work some mornings. But he won't argue, he's happy to take Tweek if it makes him feel safer.

"I understand babe, don't worry about it, I love taking you and the 10 minutes we have alone on the ride." Craig responded to the anxiety he could feel vibrating through the other.

~~~~~

As Bebe got out of her car heading to the front of Donovan Shoe Store, a wedding present from Mr.Donovan; who passed it over to her, she shot a text to her husband as she retrieved the store keys from her purse.

"Clyde, Baby, plz talk to your son about waking up earlier, I don't want to keep breaking up bathroom arguments"

Clyde stood on the high school football field with a whistle in his mouth as the team ran the track. When his pocket vibrated he pulled his phone out pushing his sunglasses up so he could read the text.

"Sure thing hun, but they're gonna argue regardless, they're twins, it's been like this since they were 7." He hit sent and stuffed the phone back in his track pants and blew on the whistle still between his teeth.

"Alright boys huddle up" he yelled across the field catching the attention of the teenage boys.

~~~~~

"Alright Buttercup, Im headed out! Come give me a kiss!" Kenny yelled through the living room as he grabbed his truck keys off the hook.

Butters walked in from the kitchen with an apron around his neck and yellow rubber gloves on his hands. "Ok Ken im coming" he placed a kiss on the taller blondes lips "Have a good day, I'll be here when you get home" Butters chipper voice followed him into his thirties.

On the ride to the Dispensary (it didn't take much for Cartman to convince him to co-sign for the store when he bought out from Towelie) Kenny thought about how happy he was that Butters decided to be a stay at home dad, because he honestly wouldn't know what to do with the house if he was given the chance.

"Okay now to tackle these dishes" Butters smiled to himself as he sifted through his 'Cleaning Playlist' on the iPad Kenny bought him for Mother's Day.

 

~~~~~

With Wendy already gone to City Hall, Stan locked the door and headed out of the driveway starting his drive to Jimbo's Guns. He realizes that with his wife being the Mayor he doesn't need a full time job but the store was a gift to him in his uncles will and besides it was something to keep him occupied when the girls weren't home. At the stoplight in front of City Hall he pulled out his phone to text Wendy.

"Hey Love, im going 2 close the shop early 2day, I'll pick up Sarah see you at home XOXO" The sound of a car horn is what made him put his phone down. 

He looked up and the light was steady green, looking in his rearview mirror he saw Eric Cartman throwing his hands up in the red minivan behind him. Someones late today, by now Cartman should already be at the dispensary. He waited the greenlight out just to piss his friend off, just because they’re in their thirties and dads now doesnt mean theyre mature around each other.

"Come on Marsh what the fuck" Cartman stuck his head out his window.

Stan stuck head out the window slightly looking in his left mirror, "You're awfully late for work Eric, did you piss off the Mrs. this morning?" Stan chuckled; the picture in his head of Kyle as a housewife was hilarious. At the sign of Cartman opening his door Stan took the now green light, he'd had his fun but he wasn't looking for a fight.

 

~~~~~

Token and Nicole had rode together to City Hall and were now standing in Wendy's office discussing funding and plans for South Parks future. They had both been on Wendy's council when she ran for the first time, and have stayed through her reelections.

Token had run to Tweek Bros. to grab the trio their morning Coffee. And as for Wendy and Nicole, when Token returns they'll have acted like they were all business but they honestly just gossip about their kids, can you blame them? They're childhood friends whose kids are dating now as teenagers.

" I can believe how enthralled they are with each other at just 15 years old" Wendy gasped throwing her hand in the air but then bringing it back down to rest her chin on.

"I can! Me and Token were the same, and so were you and Stan back when we were just 10!" Nicole pointed out smiling longing about their marriages youth.

"I sincerely thought I was being sent for coffee all these times because you two brainstorm well together, not that you just wanted to gossip about our kids relationship" Token stated mock offended as he sat the coffee's down on the desk.

Nicole and Wendy the picture of a deer caught in headlights, quickly regained composure and shushed him and continued on with their gossip.

 

~~~~~

Kyle sat in his home office looking through files of his cases, when his phone caught his eye, he hasn't gotten a text or a phone call from Eric yet, he's always really good at one of the two to let Kyle know he got to work safe.

"Maybe he's mad at me for being so bitchy about the kids this morning" Kyle mumbled to himself as he rubs his face. 

Just as he's about to text his husband to apologize, said cellphone starts to ring, lighting up with a picture of an uncomfortable looking Eric amidst their ultimately non traditional jewish wedding.  
Senior year of highschool Eric had admitted his feelings to Kyle through a theatrical performance and a promise to try the jewish religion out if he'd accept him. Ultimately yes they started dating then, but Kyle didn't push the Eric converting to Judaism thing. 

"Eric?" Kyle answered the phone after the third ring.

"I know, I know, i'm sorry but i just got to the store, Marsh thought it would be hilarious to make me sit through a green light in front of City Hall, and Kennys already being a whiny bitch about having to open the store by himself-- Whatever fuck you Kenny i'll go home!" Cartman rambled trailing off at the end obviously bickering at McCormick.

"It's fine, but will you please remember to pick up the kids after school; I have to meet with a client and then I have a meeting with the judge before im done for the day, and I need you to remember that Kylies hair appointment to get her hair straightened for homecoming is at 5:30" Kyle let out the last of his list with a sigh, today was not going to be fun, this client was a real Fucktard.

"Yeah, I'll pick the kids up, and i'm sure Kylie will remind me 20 times about the appointment before 5. But im just saying if she didnt have crazy curly hair it wouldnt be costing us $100 dollars everytime she wanted straight hair; oh wait plus the extra forty so it doesnt ruin her 'precious virgin ginger hair' whatever the fuck that means" Eric mockly trailed off and Kyle could practically see the air quotes he was undoubtedly using. 

"Well she has my gene's running in her, but don't even get me started on how much Aaron looks like you and when he makes that fucking face when he has an attitude i wanna strangle him" Kyle gritts out

"Yeah Yeah our kids are handfuls, i have to go now, i love you my darling Jew Prince" Cartman manages to get out between laughs

"Love you too asshole, remember our kids, bye." Kyle hangs up setting his phone down for the case file. And it's only noon…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so the way that I had Cartman and Kyle's relationship start is based off the Kyman animation that im absolutely in love with right now. Its a animation for a song 'I could be Jewish for you' Here's the link if you want to see what that part of the fic is based on https://youtu.be/59jetYPAuiY and yes I meant to type mother's day.

**Author's Note:**

> This is gonna have more chapters because im literally in love with this idea, and I made a giant outline for this being a whole giant thing lol, I hope other people appreciate this. Leave comments <333


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